Change is Inevitable

Change is one of those things that will forever and always be a constant in life. It will always be there. Sometimes in the form of a blessing. Sometimes in a curse.

But that change is inevitable means we can either embrace it, take it, or change the change.

Parents are special in that they get to see all the changes their children go through from infants, to little children, to young adults, and then adults. I have changed a lot in my 29 years. But in a lot of ways, I am who I always was. Except there have been some times in the past six years, where I wasn’t me.

Change does happen over time, and in my life, I didn’t see it happening. But I was changing. And not in a good way. I lost who I was.

It took hitting rock bottom for me to see it. And once I did, I began to re-embrace me, the real Richard.

In Life As a House, George says:

“You know the great thing, though, is that change can be so constant you don’t even feel the difference until there is one. It can be so slow that you don’t even notice that your life is better or worse, until it is. Or it can just blow you away, make you something different in an instant. It happened to me.”

And it’s true. Change is hard to feel when it happens a little at a time until you get to your destination and you don’t even know who you are and how you got there.

What is my grand ‘ol lesson for you now? Listen.

Listen to yourself. Listen to those around you. And as you listen, reflect:

Is this change for good or worse?

FOCUS: Not-so Broken Hearts!

Selected Life Lesson
A broken heart cannot kill you.
-Heather P’s Life Lesson from Marion, Iowa

Richard’s Thoughts…
The last 400 days of my life have been quite the roller-coaster. Never before did I think I would again be single, get fired, run a marathon and then decide to stay in New York City for another two years! But here I am; probably as happy as I have ever been.

What do I owe this to? Perseverance. Sure, I struggled this past year. I went through a bout of depression. And I just wanted to quit at life sometimes. But we always make it through.

In the moment, I was not the most positive person in the world. (Just ask Steve!) But no matter how broken you are, we, this community is here for you. I love you for the time you give me each week. And trust me, you can make it through any battle.

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FOCUS: Be the Solution!

Selected Life Lesson
If you’re not part of the solution, you are part of the problem.
-Peggy S’ Life Lesson from the Des Moines, Iowa

Richard’s Thoughts…
Peggy is definitely sharing a true life lesson this week, and it can be true for work and life. I wish I had some profound addition to the lesson, but all I can say it this: Be an asset.

Have you ever sat in a meeting with no direction or end in sight? Waste of time, right?

Or feel like you or your company was not doing enough to be amazing? Waste of energy and resources, right?

That ends now for your life. It’s time to be willing to go after your goals and dreams and be a part of your own solution. What do you want? Tell me.

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What is a Mistake?

This is part of my monthly newsletter (which is free, by the way)! Sign up here to get it delivered to your mailbox each month!

I have been asking myself this question a lot lately. I also used to think that I was a person who wore his heart on his sleeve. It turns out perhaps that has not always been the case. Maybe I was more guarded than I thought. That has to change.

This is scary to me. I know it is scary to others too. But it has to change. Too many mistakes in my life, and in the history of the world, occur because what we are thinking and feeling doesn’t get expressed.

You’re with me right?

It could be a meeting with your boss. You’re fired up about something and you go in with an agenda, and you get scared or nervous – both natural emotions – but you don’t do what you set out to do. You didn’t listen to your heart.

I also wish I had a grand way to not let that happen. When I do figure it out, I will give that advice away for free.

But I found that quote from Winston Churchill and I’m constantly reminding myself of that this past week. We can only worry about the next chain, not the 15th link. It is the now that matters. It’s in the living that we make the life we want. Planning is good, but execution is key.

Where do you want to be in five years? Who the hell cares. Live for today and build the framework for tomorrow. Tomorrow you may find a new passion that drives you completely in a different direction. That is not a mistake. That is an act of personal heroism.

But, for me, I now know how to limit the possibility of a mistake occurring:

Speak Up
When I feel or think something, I now either write it down, or at least verbalize it to someone. When you keep thoughts inside, you don’t really hear them and it is difficult to analyze the emotions behind them.

Listen
Along with speaking up, you have to listen to yourself. Sure, if you’re talking with someone about something you should listen to what they say too. But almost more importantly, listen to yourself. Are you excited? Angry? Does it even make rational sense?

Act
The greatest misfortune in life – in my opinion – is not acting on something that you want. If you want to be a writer, write the shit out of that journal! If you want to be the next Mark Zuckerberg, start creating great stuff! If you love someone, tell them the next time you see them! Wait, tell them right now!

A mistake is only a mistake if you don’t learn from it, and try to re-execute better the next time. It doesn’t mean you change the goal, but try a different tactic. Re-think how you got to that place. There is a way out. There is a solution.

The only mistake is not trying.

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